Did you know that there are more than 30 million slaves today & between 14,500 & 17,500 people are trafficked into the U.S. every year. Y'all, sex trafficking is a
very real thing. A lot of people do not realize how real it is & if there are actual sex traffickers in their own city or state. Well, just to show you how real it is...there were 18 survivors freed & 169 traffickers arrested in Atlanta the night of the Super Bowl. If that doesn't tell you something then I don't know what will.
This is kind of a hard subject for me to talk about, but I feel like God has wanted me to share my story for a long time now & I've just been too stubborn to do it. & what's a better day to do it then on today. So, here goes nothing & y'all are about to see me get all vulnerable & stuff haha. & if you were ever iffy on the real me, well, this is it right here.
As some of you may know, I grew up in south Louisiana. My dad pastored in a town called Grand Isle & he also was a church planter. I grew up a pastors kid & I'm not gonna lie...it was hard.-----you're probably wondering why I'm telling you all this. Trust me, I'm getting there. I gotta stop having a panic attack first--- haha kidding;)-----the point of my background is that I saw all the inside stuff. I saw the life of a pastor & I went through what pastor's families go through day in & day out.
In my last blog I mentioned how I struggled at the age of 12 with stealing stuff & never feeling blessed with the things I had. I was always wanting to be excepted. Well, shortly after all of that a guy stepped into my life. This guy was 8 years older than me and this guy was my youth pastor. He had always been pretty close to my family. Pretty close as in my dad was his mentor, he was ordained by my dad, & my mom treated him like her own son. I always struggled with the fact of being a pastor's daughter. Kids never treated me normal and they always pointed me out as the goody-two-shoes that never did anything wrong. So, between the age of 13 & 14 I got involved in a secret relationship with my youth pastor. At the beginning he always said sweet things to me and always treated me right. He told me he loved me & wanted to marry me one day. Now, 13 year old me was literally head over heals for this guy. I would've believed anything he said to me & done anything he asked of me. I believed that I loved him & he loved me more than anything. It was about 3 months into this "relationship" that he tested the fact I would do anything. He started to get very sexual with me. I knew it was wrong, but I didn't stop it.
About 3 months later we got caught & he got arrested. I remember waking up out of a dead sleep in the middle of the night finding out he was arrested. I felt like my legs had been swept out from underneath me. In that moment I felt like my whole world was ripped to pieces. Everything had been taken from me. I fell into such a deep & dark depression that I still to this day don't remember what happened two weeks after all of this. Everything went blank. & let me be real with you... the happy and talkative Hannah Boss you know, still battles with depression & anxiety to this day. I can't tell you how many times that I can't get myself out of my bed because all I think about is when this man told me when I turned 18 he was going to come & get me & we'd move away together. I just turned 18 & I still wake up hesitant to leave my house & it has almost been 4 years. This guy manipulated me into loving him. I eventually found out that he also watched pornography on a regular basis. This guy didn't love me. All he wanted was to fulfill sexual desires & I was in his path to do so.
Now, it was during the hardest & darkest times in my life that God showed me what real love was. He put people in my life that constantly loved me through my mistakes & never left me. They showed me that even when you can't get out of the bed or feel ashamed to show your face or even just the fear of leaving your house that God never stopped loving me & they were there to walk day in & day out with me.
I was blessed to get caught. If I didn't It could've turned into something much worse.
Sex trafficking starts small just like my situation & it grows into a very evil thing.
If you know of anyone who is going through something similar to this or you yourself is going through this please come & talk to me! Just remember you are loved & NOT alone. I spoke up, it's your turn.xoxoHB #enditmovement
I just want to give a big thanks to my parents; missionaries who poured endless time into me summer after summer; Coach Darcy, who pushed me to be a better ball player during that time; & Devan Champion. If it wasn't for Devan pushing me to talk to a counselor about my fears & problems I wouldn't be where I am today. I love y'all tremendously. Thank you for all the love & tough talks<3
"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect & complete, lacking in nothing."~James 1:2-4
"We love because he first loved us."~ 1 John 4:19